Everything Goes On

They first met through their work. Co-workers separated by oceans but who got along better than anyone they knew in person. They were small time streamers of little renown, signed to a middling company which could do little more than manage their marketing. It was a huge relief for him though and an excellent place for a hobbyist. It was the one thing he could never do. But for her? For her, they were just a steppingstone. And everyone knew it. She shone brighter than any other team member in each and every way. It wasn’t just her talent as an entertainer; it was her honed eye as an artist, her skilled voice, her ability to learn and adapt to any situation or new skill.

This was just her first step into this world.

Somehow, he’d been lucky enough to Collab with her and the chemistry was instant. It was clear how much more vibrant he became around her, how much more alive he become. She was able to match the rising and falling tides of his energy in ways that drew in everyone who watched. He didn't just need to be energetic with her, he could also be exhausted. And to his great relief, it was clear how much brighter she grew around him. He drew out a playful side of her, an honest side of her she couldn’t exhibit on her own. One she didn’t show with anyone but him.

They formed a bond stronger than co-workers or even teammates. Perhaps more even than partners in crime. For it became clear rather quickly they had found in each other partners for life. They shared stories of their lives with one another in such deafening depths and crystal-clear clarity there was little doubt. All of which was blown away by the dreams they shared and built together. Bit by bit. Board by board. Until they had a ship, ready to set sail for distant horizons.

Yet they were always partners in life at a distance. Their work became inextricably linked even as they looked beyond past the middling company they found themselves in and set their sights on those farther and distant horizons. They were a minor success but not enough to justify crossing that figurative or literal ocean for one another. To justify uprooting their lives and committing not only to each other, but to their hopes and dreams.

It did not stop them from dreaming.

“I wanna take you to the sea.” He said to her. “And when I’m better, we’ll do everything.” But there was no denying her talent far outstripped his own. She encouraged him and supported him but she was never foolish enough to lie to him. There was a gulf between their lives he had yet to cross. There was still much for him to learn to truly stand at her side. It was a gulf he wasn’t sure he could cross.

They first met through their work. Co-workers separated by oceans but who got along better than anyone they knew in person. They were small time streamers of little renown, signed to a middling company which could do little more than manage their marketing. It was all he needed to get started. She often found herself marveling at his courage to pursue something he had never done before in an industry with such unpredictable waves. Yet even though he was only a part-timer, time and time again, his ship withstood the ebb and flow of those waters. It was a testament to the strength of his character and the ease with which he could change direction at a moment’s notice.

He would go far.

Somehow, she’d been lucky enough to Collab with him and the chemistry was instant. It was clear how much brighter she grew around him. She could be playful with him but what she treasured most was the honesty he could draw out of her. The sincerity he found in her words which he could shine back at her like a lighthouse, guiding her onward. And to her great relief, he too became more vibrant around her, more alive as he found someone he could be playful with. Someone with who he could sail the cresting and rolling waves.

They formed a bond stronger than co-workers or even teammates. Perhaps more even than partners in crime. For it became clear rather quickly they had found in each other partners for life. They shared stories of their lives with one another in such deafening depths and crystal-clear clarity there was little doubt. All of which was blown away by the dreams they shared and built together. Bit by bit. Board by board. Until they had a ship, ready to set sail for distant horizons.

Yet they were always partners in life at a distance. Their work became inextricably linked even as they looked beyond past the middling company they found themselves in and set their sights on those farther and distant horizons. They were a minor success but not enough to justify crossing that figurative or literal ocean for one another. To justify uprooting their lives and committing not only to each other, but to their hopes and dreams.

It did not stop them from dreaming.

“I wanna take you to the sea.” She said to him. “And when I’m better, we’ll do everything.” It was true, her light had attracted more viewers but they were only ever inspired by her light. She wanted to do more. She wanted to do what he did. She wanted to be capable of not only inspiring them but ferrying them to fairer waters. She wasn’t sure she was capable of that.

Streaming had been a hobby for him; something he did in his spare time. Every entertainment skill he’d learned had been learned late in life. He was not a prodigy whose talent would suddenly and naturally bloom. It had all been painfully learned failure by failure at an age and time when time was no longer on his side. That middling company truly was perfect for a hobbyist like him while his other work sustained him financially if not emotionally. He wasn’t sure he could reach that horizon they dreamed of. He wasn’t sure he had the talent.

It meant he couldn’t be sure he could keep the promises he made to her. If it was no longer just a hobby, if he truly left everything behind to pursue that horizon with her, would they ever truly reach that skyline they envisioned beyond the horizon? Was it ever even a skyline he had truly seen? She had seen it, there was no doubt of that. But for him, it may have only been a mirage. A siren’s call to which his ship would be dashed upon the rocks. It could destroy his life as he scrambled to stay above the waters. It would destroy their dreams if he failed.

But she believed in him, trusting in his ability to shine along side her. If only it was no longer a hobby, she believed, if he dedicated his time and stepped off that safe harbor, she was sure he could make it. She was sure he could sail through any sea. And if he could make it, they could make it.

She’d spent her entire life dedicated to her craft. Even as a child, she knew what she wanted and she pursed it relentlessly. The medium may have shifted, the way her craft was presented, but the core of it was ever the same. She was meant for this. And she deserved to shine as brightly as the stars. It was a height she could most certainly reach.

If she pursued it on her own.

Ever since she was a child, she had stared up at those dazzling lights and dreamed of becoming one of them. She dedicated her life to chasing the skills and talent she would need to stand shoulder to shoulder with those stars. She promised herself she would one day reach that night sky. And she had kept that promise to herself.

Or so she told herself.

She had found success with this company and though it was a minor success, it was still a success. She had an audience and that was what mattered. She was practicing the gifts, the skills, and the talent she had nurtured all those years. The things others had ignored more times than she could count. This was not only the first company to give her a chance, it had been the only company to give her a chance. This was her livelihood. This was her life.

Could she really throw it all away to keep the promises she made to him? That dream of hers had been her guiding light for all these years, a northern star to keep herself from giving up. But stars are not meant to be touched. They live far away in the night sky, inspiring those who see their light and guiding sailors to their destination. And just as she could never reach that star, they could never touch the horizon. It would always be off in the distance, always moving, always out of reach.

But he believed in her. He always supported her, encouraging her to pursue that relentless horizon and those unreachable stars. If the horizon was ever moving, they need only bring their audience along as they set sail, sharing in the sights and adventure. And those unreachable stars? They only needed to use their gifts, their skills, and their talent to build a ship to reach those stars.

He could do it. He had spent his life finding ways to reach his destination. Even if the destination was never quite satisfying enough, she knew he would find a way. More than that, he would bring those sailors along with him and give them an experience they would cherish forever.

She just wasn’t sure she dared step aboard his ship and join him on that endless journey.

But it would not be easy for her to reach that horizon even if he was not at her side. She was a shining star but there are many stars out there in the world. Bright as she was, she still needed her light to be seen. And even if it were seen, it may not be the light the companies they longed for wanted. And then, no matter what skyline she found, it still meant she would have to leave behind those who had already fallen in love with her light. And there was no guarantee they could find her in that bright, starry sky again.

Perhaps, he would sometimes wonder on his darker days, it would be better for the sun to set on their middling company. She was already the only reason they had not abandoned ship. She was their guiding light, their northern star. But if the company forced their hand, she would set sail for that horizon they all knew she would reach. And he would watch happily as she sailed off into that sunset knowing she would find her destination. He could close this chapter of his life, continuing on with the life he had always been meant to lead before their starlit paths crossed. Two ships passing in the night.

It may be sad for a time as they imagined their parting but he was sure it would not last. They would grieve while they were together but as she set off for that horizon, as she took her place among that starry night, her sparkling light would banish the clouds. And though he might not be standing by her side, he would happily bask in her light. Sometimes, he knew, wishing the greatest things for your greatest loves greatest dreams meant it would take them far away from you.

And one day, he would just be a story she told.

It took little time for them to feel like they had known each other for lifetimes. In that warm comfort, there was also a terrifying wave of fear. If she left, could she really continue on? She had learned to lean on him in ways she had never needed to on her own. When she pursued her path alone, she had learned to rely on herself. She had team members she would work with but it had always been a dream she chased on her own. But with him, they had moored their ships together, their fates.

And yet there was an even deeper fear.

What if, in mooring their ships together, he could no longer travel as freely? Shine as brightly? She had been cultivating her light her entire life, carefully honing her talent. Yet he had only just started. These were only the first ripples of life in those waters. She was confident they would grow into those gentle waves that rock a ship and bring its sailors home. But what if, in standing by her side, she blinded others to his light? What if, in allowing him to support her, the ripples of his journey were destroyed by the waves of her own?

Perhaps, she would sometimes wonder on her darker days, it would be better for their relationship to end. The time they spent together and perhaps, she painfully hoped, the pain he felt at her loss would be the spark which ignited his soul. The spark for him to fully commit to the guiding light he could become. She would continue on the journey she had always meant to merely gazing up at the brilliant stars of the night sky.

It may be sad for a time as they imagined their parting but she was sure it would not last. They would grieve while they were together but as that spark ignited his soul and he built the ship which would carry him off into the horizon, he would be a travelling lighthouse to all lost sailors. And though she might not be standing by his side, she would happily bask in his light. Sometimes, she knew, wishing the greatest things for your greatest loves greatest dreams meant it would take them far away from you.

And one day, she would just be a story he told.

In imagining his fears, in giving voice to them, he began to see hers. After all, why does a star that shines so bright choose to stay tethered to safe harbor? Why did she, as talented as she was, not pursue the heights she was always meant for? Why did she hold onto them so closely when she could pursue the stars on her own?

Because she was afraid. Because they had enabled her doubt and her fear when they kept her there. Because his imposter syndrome and fear of inadequacy formed waves of fear which amplified her own. They formed terrifying stealth waves which crashed against their ships, safe and sheltered but only in harbor. If he hesitated from pursing the skies she was meant for, it gave her reason to stay at that harbor. They could dream of the stars while never truly pursuing them.

It was in that moment, in that realization, he resolved to bring the sea to her. She was meant for something more. This middling company was only a passing port for her and he would push her off its dock even if he had to abandon his own ship to do so. Though he would always doubt himself, believing he could only pretend, he would believe in her. They would believe she could lead the way and he could support her journey.

And so, even as those turbulent waters threatened to capsize their ship, they met. No longer just co-workers in an online world. He crossed an ocean for her.

In imagining her fears, in giving voice to them, she began to see his. After all, why does an apprenticing shipwright refuse to work on a new ship? Why did he, as talented as he was, not embark on the journey he was always meant for? Why did he hold onto them so closely when he could be the guiding light for so many other sailors on his own?

Because he was afraid. Because they had enabled his contentedness and complacency by keeping him there. Because her fear of reaching the night sky she always dreamed of formed waves of fear which amplified his own. They formed terrifying stealth waves which crashed against their ships, safe and sheltered but only in harbor. If she hesitated from pursing the skies she was meant for, it gave him reason to stay at that harbor. They could dream of the stars while never truly pursuing them.

It was in that moment, in that realization, she resolved to bring the sea to him. He was meant for something more. This middling company was only a passing port for him and she would push him off its dock even if she had to drag him aboard her ship. Though she would always fear that night sky, forever out of reach, she would believe in him. They would believe he could build a ship that would take them to the stars.

And so, even as those turbulent waters threatened to capsize their ship, they met. No longer just co-workers in an online world. She crossed an ocean for him.

They were together at last. When they were finally together, finally, truly in each other’s world, they bumped their shoulders lightly. It was just as they imagined small boats in gentle waves might harmlessly bump their padded hulls together. But their shoulders never separated. They pressed together gently, feeling each other’s warmth.

And just like that, neither of them were suffering anymore.

He was no longer scared of failing her.

She was no longer scared of the night sky.

I’m sorry that you worried. They said. But don’t apologize. I told you to forget me, but you stayed by my side.

They were together at last. When they were finally together, finally, truly in each other’s world, they bumped their shoulders lightly. It was just as they imagined small boats in gentle waves might harmlessly bump their padded hulls together. But their shoulders never separated. They pressed together gently, feeling each other’s warmth.

And just like that, neither of them were suffering anymore.

She was no longer scared of the night sky.

He was no longer scared of failing her.

I’m sorry that you worried. They said. But don’t apologize. I told you to forget me, but you stayed by my side.

You will never just be a story I’ve been told. They said to each other. No matter what happens, I will always remember you fondly. This life we shared, these dreams we will live, are not just pretend. It is true, no matter what happens, everything will go on. But these horizons we chase, these starry night skies, will always give way to the daylight. And no matter what sea we find ourselves on as we gaze at the ever-changing sky, I will always want you by my side.

You will never just be a story I’ve been told. They said to each other. No matter what happens, I will always remember you fondly. This life we shared, these dreams we will live, are not just pretend. It is true, no matter what happens, everything will go on. But these horizons we chase, these starry night skies, will always give way to the daylight. And no matter what sea we find ourselves on as we gaze at the ever-changing sky, I will always want you by my side.